The Birds

As a visitor, the first thing that strikes you in Australia is the bird life. They are so different from any that you’ve seen and heard before – it’s like a pet shop. Big, white, sulphur-crested cockatoos – beautiful… …until you hear their screech! 

Rainbow Lorikeet, Cockatoo and Kookaburra

Pied magpies that look familiar, but make a flute like warbling. And parrots everywhere: crimson and blue rosellas; grey and red galahs; and the king – bright green with a red head. Wednesday morning when I walked out to go to work I heard a kookaburra laughing hysterically – maybe he knew something!

Carol, knowing my interest in birds, gave me an Australian Field Guide for Father’s Day (actually Father’s Day isn’t until September, but I’m not telling!). We’d heard this strange descending cooing noise from a black bird – the book says it’s the currawong ‘with a cry like a disappointed schoolgirl.’

Magpie, Rosella, and Galah

We have a family whistle: maybe you do?  Two tones: the first a little higher than the second – useful in busy stores, when you get split-up. I was working at home alone quietly on Saturday, when I heard the family whistle. It was a bird, of course, but was it mimicking me, calling me to feed it, or was it… …more sinister?

The language is different here. Auto repair shops advertise ‘smash repair,’ the guys with the moving trucks are ‘removalists; and it’s Kellogg’s Rice Bubbles that go ‘snap, crackle and pop’. And, the Aussies like to shorten words, usually to end in a vowel, not in the same way as other English-speakers. Hence, the Salvation Army are the Salvos – it’s written on their collection boxes; Ambos are paramedics; Garbos pick up the rubbish; Bubs are babies, and the Hell’s Angels are a Bikie Gang. Then there are Skimpies – the scantily clad barmaids who, shall we say, dress down to gain larger tips…

Every Wednesday morning at around 10:30, as long as there are no customers in, we have ‘Morno’s’ (short for morning tea) where one of us brings in hot sausage rolls, pies, cakes, etc. and we all get together for coffee, a munch and a chinwag (open discussion).  I think Arvo’s (afternoon tea) may be next!

High Commissioner’s Residence

It’s Canada Day as I write this – Canada’s 140^th Birthday. Canberra’s a small city and so I was invited to the Canadian High Commissioner’s Residence for a reception in honour of the occasion. It’s a grand house in a plush neighbourhood – I walked to the door clutching my invitation, surrounded by dignitaries and high-ranking military officers from many nations. The anthems were sung and toasts were proposed:

Toastmaster: ‘To the Queen and her great nation of Canada.’

Assembled crowd as they raised their glasses: ‘To the Queen.’

Toastmaster: ‘To the Queen and her great nation of Australia.’

Assembled crowd: ‘To the Queen.’

Canada Day at Canadian High Commissioners Residence

I spoke for a while to a priest. He told me he was a diplomat for a well-known religious Embassy – I hadn’t realized they had embassies, but it turns out they have a lot. As we spoke, a reporter for the Canberra Times appeared. ‘Can I take your picture together and ask you some questions?’ she asked.

‘Yes of course’ we said, then he added: ‘But, I must put down my beer before you take my picture.’

I was drinking orange-juice, so I said: ‘We could just swap glasses!’ So, we did. I haven’t seen the picture yet but the guys at work have threatened to add a bubble above my head saying: ‘So, three priests went in to a bar…’  

Post blog note: The picture was in the paper the following week, but I went the Canberra Times office and chose a more convivial one, shown here. His Excellency the Reverend Okolo was promoted to Archbishop the following year and is now the Apostolic Nuncio to Ireland.

Sunset with Clouds

Winter in Canberra

We moved into a town house in Kingston. It’s a suburb of Canberra that reminds me of Kensington (the one in Calgary) – it’s a popular spot centered on a block of stores about half of which are restaurants (shown below), located fairly close to the Parliament Buildings. I tell people there are 20 restaurants in the block, 24 of which are Italian - there really are 4 Italian restaurants in a row…  …and you have to book well in advance to get a table. We’re gradually working our way through them all.

Kingston Restaurants

The house has walled-in patios at the front and rear; I’ve put my mandatory barbeque on the rear one. Barbeques are a little different here – mostly bigger – and they all have a hot plate as well as grills; really good for doing sliced capsicums (bell peppers) and onions.

The first day of winter was the first of June. Driving to work, the guy on the radio said: “It’s a bitterly cold 5° this morning so ‘rug-up’!” Actually, it is cold. Houses here are designed for a warm climate: without insulation, double glazing, or door seals - our house has several large skylights, one of which is the whole width of the house. So, when it’s cold outside, it’s cold inside. We’ve had frost for a few mornings – I miss my Canadian Tire scraper – using a credit card is hard work – and I didn’t bring gloves!

Our Sunny Patio

But Australians look forward to winter; it holds the promise of rain. The crisis here is the ‘big dry’; several years of drought have turned farmland brown and rivers into streams: Lake George, just north of Canberra has turned into pasture. Most communities have water restrictions, banning lawn sprinklers, the washing of cars etc.

 I bought a compass today. I realized over the last couple of weeks that I’ve lost my sense of direction; something I’ve always prided myself on. Our house has some cold bits but the patio at the front is a real suntrap – you can see it through the patio doors here. It’s north facing of course, and I knew that, but I just couldn’t get my head round it. Hopefully, I’ll re-orientate soon, but I’ll probably be lost when I get home.

Drive-Thru Liquor Store

I’ve noticed that the Australians have a more relaxed attitude toward alcohol. Kingston has a drive-thru liquor store where you can pull up right alongside the bar and order 2 bottles of Cab Sav (Cabernet Sauvignon), 6 VBs (Victoria Bitter, beer) and a bottle of Bundy (70° proof rum).  In many companies, employees have a glass of wine or a beer at the end of the day on Friday, before taking off home. And, as many Aussies will tell you, Foster’s is only for export – I’ve yet to see it for sale here.

I took several pictures before I took the one below. The guy came out from behind the counter and called out: ‘You got a problem mate?’

‘No, I’m just a passing Canadian – I’ve never seen a Drive Thru.’

‘Oh. No worries. We have ‘em everywhere here – I guess it’s too cold in Canada!’

The 11 June was a holiday to mark the Queen’s Birthday. It’s the one weekend of the year when there are ‘Cracker (fireworks) Parties’ all over Canberra. Like Guy Fawkes Day in the UK, they count the number of burn victims the following day, with the radio announcing that hordes of quivering pets were hiding out all over town – hopefully not in my back yard.

Canberra is the only major city in Australia that’s not on the coast. So, we often pop to Batemans Bay, the closest coastal community to Canberra, just two hours away.

Sunset at Bateman Bay

*Note: This piece was originally written in June 2007

Arrival In Canberra

In 2007, my wife and I had the opportunity to work in Australia for a number of months. It was quite an adventure and I kept a record of our time there…

We arrived in Australia, where it’s always tomorrow… …an upside-down world where we’re looking for a place to live with a sunny North-facing backyard; where we can sit out and avoid the bitterly cold South wind; and drink 2% milk, which is, of course, 98% non-fat milk. Perhaps the most annoying thing to hit newcomers is the turn signal lever on the right side of the steering wheel – so, visitors are the guys who use their wipers to indicate left! 

Kangaroo in Tidbinbilla

We left Calgary in spring and went straight to fall without passing summer. This gave me season lag – although I knew it was almost winter, deep down inside I felt like it was almost summer. Despite it being a quite warm 15°C, the leaves were falling from the trees, and people were wearing sweaters and wooly hats. It did get dark around 5pm though – spooky. 

We went looking for our first kangaroo. They’re everywhere, we were told, although most likely your first one will be dead… …and so it was. Our first specimen was road kill – laying quietly beside the road, as if sleeping, Later that day as dusk fell, we saw a live one – a large Eastern grey about the size of a deer leapt from the woods right in front of the car and bounded on regardless, unaware of how close it came to joining its friend. 

We’d been house hunting and I thought we’d found a place to live; the search was interesting... We were offered a brand-new duplex in a retirement community consisting of about 16 really plush homes (bungalows and duplexes). I was keen; if only so I could say ‘I live in an Old Peoples home.’ 

Rainbow Lorikeet

There was on Open House there on Sunday. Robert, a big man, introduced himself and I told him we were looking for one of the rentals. He snapped: ‘There are no rentals here!’ 

‘I think you’ll find there are,’ I said. 

‘Look mate, none of these properties are to rent… And besides, you need to be 55 or over to live here!’ 

‘I am.’ I said. But, I had to make a hasty retreat as he strode toward me. 

The following day we went back to visit two of these properties, available for rent from the owners. We parked at the back of #4 and a young guy met us and walked us round. It was a beautiful villa, so new the appliances weren’t installed. ‘You get a dishwasher, stove and dryer,’ he said, just before we left. 

We waited for the other agent to come and show us the duplex, which was a little cheaper. Our agent’s phone rang. ‘I’m in the street in front of the house,’ she said, so we drove round. She was parked in front of the same unit, #4. Our agent said: ‘Bob, I know you. Do not say anything!’ My lips were sealed of course, but we could not look at each other… 

We toured the house and eventually came to the appliances. ‘You get a dishwasher and a stove,’ she said. 

‘What, no dryer?’ 

‘No. No dryer... You have a washing line in the back yard,’ she added. 

Sadly, we didn’t take the villa/duplex; it just wasn’t where we wanted to live. Retirement had been that close… 

We found a place in a suburb called Kingston. I’ll tell you about that in the next blog.

Note: By the way, the comment it’s always tomorrow refers to the fact that Australia always seems to be a day ahead of the rest of the world, Canada anyway. It seemed we were always waiting for everyone else to catch up.

The Blue Mountains